URGENT!!

Recently, a virus has been discovered in Western Haiti dubbed "Necro-Mortosis". In truth, it is actually as bad as it sounds. The infected die, usually withing 48 hours, after which, their body is reanimated, a la George A. Romero. It can be transfered via any bodily fluid contact and is 100% fatal. A vaccine is in the works, but there has been little, if any success.

Wow

Tis been many moons since blog has laid eyes upon update. Big chief been on hunting trip, unable to bring blog. Now is back, must get settled in before new post is written.

It's late and I'm tired...

So at my school, there was supposed to be a protest on Nov. 6. It was something about permitting concealed handgun license holders to be able to bring the weapons on campus. I'm not going to be talking about sides on this one, I just want to explain what happened. The protest was to consist of people carrying empty holsters to school and passing out pamphlets or some junk like that. Well, I don't guess the school cared for that too much, so they didn't allow it to happen. If you're carrying an empty holster, doesn't that count as outerwear? I'm not too savvy on this, but it seams that it would be the exact same thing as wearing a shirt with a gun on it. Let me know what you guys think on this one.

Move Over Joker

What does it take for someone to go nuts? Not much, apparently. Maybe boredom? In the comics and movies, supervillains are notoriously creepy, inherently scary, and slightly flamboyant, but if you come across that type in real life, well...you may not be as impressed. The "supervillains" in real life are more like one hit wonders. I suppose you would have to have superpowers not to get caught by the justice system if you pulled off schemes the likes of Magneto. Maybe eventually, technology will allow for some really psychotic villains, but in the meantime, I guess we'll just have to settle for these guys.

[Via Cracked]

Nice meat you got there...

These kinds of world records have never sat well with me. Make a giant food, get your name in a book. Wow. That's difficult. Forget the guy who came up with that two handed guitar chord(i don't know how that's possible, either. I guess that's why he holds the record...), this guy just got a lot of meat and...cooked it! Simply amazing. I don't know what's more disturbing, the fact that these guys get their kicks from making balls of meat, or the fact that said ball of meat looks like Mel Gibson's liver.

USA Today on retarded meatball...

Tongue-In-Cheek: When Dweebs Reproduce

This is pretty good: Tongue-In-Cheek: When Dweebs Reproduce

Watch out for that Elephant

So apparently in Oklahoma, their circuses are a lot less...intense (i'm sorry about that). Here, when there's a circus, it's held in a coloseum in the middle of the city and there's a lot of people. I guess they do things a little different in Oklahoma. A couple of days ago an elephant escaped from a circus and made it's way across fields and found itself in the middle of an old farm road. You can guess what happened. The elephant wasn't hurt too badly, but it kinda makes you wonder who they let watch the animals. Those guys must have graduated from clown college or something. Wait...yeah. How does a huge 10 ton animal just get up and leave? Do they not keep them in cages anymore? Can you Imagine what the crash scene was like?

Mary: "Oh dear, we hit something! What was it?"

Fred: "I'm not sure, let me get out and see?"

*Opens Door and gets out*

Fred: "It looks like a big...dog? With horns!"

Anyway, let this be a lesson for all you dropouts who ran away with the circus. Keep an eye on the animals!

China: The World Leader In Civil Rights

Man, I don't know why no one has thought of this before! The ever progressive China has now officially banned physical punishment for internet "addicts" after one kid was beaten to death at an internet boot camp.

You know, I read these articles on how China is dealing with it's people, and I've come to a conclusion: We need to be more like the Chinese! They are so good with their citizens, it's almost hard to believe. Here in America, we have things like minimum wage, and trial by jury, but over there! My heart jumps at the chance to travel abroad and be so lucky as to go to that grand country!